Today I am having a rough day. I am having a mental battle with myself. I am fighting off the negative thoughts of I don't want to run tonight and the ones that are trying to make excuses on why not to run. Ugh I wish they would just go away. Running today is more important then ever because it will push through the negative and I wont go back down the path into a self destruction.
Its so important for me to stick to my guns today because of these feelings. While I was at the commissary today there was chocolate EVERYWHERE and I again was able to fight the temptation. It feels good to be able to know my will power is on point today since I am having this mental battle. I am truly in a funk over this I really don't want to do anything but go to bed. Luckily I have Emalynn here and since she is up I am unable to do just that. The day is dragging which I think makes the funk a little worse.
To fight days like this I need to make a plan, go to the park, go for a walk, do some errands, call my BFF (she is very busy this week) she would tell me to get over it; that is how we roll LOL. Something that gets me out of the house and out of my internal conversation. Blogging today is what is getting me out of that conversation because its to chilly outside for Emalynn to be out to long even bundled up, I did do an errand today but I guess it wasn't enough to break the funk.
My BFF called and I feel tons better! Its amazing how a 15 minute conversation can change your outlook of your day. She made me laugh, let me vent gave me some advice on how to get out my funk and helped me move on with my day. Soon after we hung up Matthew and I went for our run and I am so glad I did, I feel so much better. I ran all those negative thoughts out of me stomped them right into the ground.
Krysta has decided she wants in on this running thing so Matthew and her will run on the days we don't. She is excited to have daddy daughter time and get a workout at the same time. Since playing basketball she would like to get her stamina up so she can run the entire game without getting winded. I am hopeful this will become something she loves to do and will continue through her life.
So for my day starting out rough I can say it ended much better. Got my run in ate right and now its time to relax and enjoy my family!
what I have been saying to myself all day... You can beat this, you are better then this!!!
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